The Baby Juice Express

The Baby Juice Express

85 mins | Crime, Comedy | April 19, 2004

A middle class London lad’s gangster fantasies go awry when his dodgy uncle puts them into debt to a real life crime boss. Still pulling strings from behind bars, the kingpin’s only desire is to conceive an heir by smuggling his sperm to his wife on the outside. There’s only one way the boys know how to raise the money fast … hijack the ‘baby juice express’. But kidnapping ‘baby juice’ turns out to be fraught with even more peril than the bumbling wannabes could possibly have imagined in this cheeky spin on the gangster genre. Starring Nick Moran (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels), with Julian Clary (one of Britain’s funniest) and Joe Bugner (former boxing champion and one of Australia’s toughest!).

The Baby Juice Express

85 mins | Crime, Comedy | April 19, 2004

The Baby Juice Express
A middle class London lad’s gangster fantasies go awry when his dodgy uncle puts them into debt to a real life crime boss. Still pulling strings from behind bars, the kingpin’s only desire is to conceive an heir by smuggling his sperm to his wife on the outside. There’s only one way the boys know how to raise the money fast … hijack the ‘baby juice express’. But kidnapping ‘baby juice’ turns out to be fraught with even more peril than the bumbling wannabes could possibly have imagined in this cheeky spin on the gangster genre. Starring Nick Moran (Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels), with Julian Clary (one of Britain’s funniest) and Joe Bugner (former boxing champion and one of Australia’s toughest!).
IMDb rating 5.2
Producers
Original title The Baby Juice Express
Directors Michael Hurst
Writers Michael Hurst, Nick Moran

Cast

Nick Moran

as Des

Nick Brimble

as Krakowski

Lisa Faulkner

as Lauren

Phil Davis

as Frank O'Reilly

Samantha Womack

as Trixie (as Samantha Janus)

Joe Bugner

as Palooka

Julian Clary

as Jason

Angela Douglas

as Celestia

David Cardy

as Goldberg

Ruth Jones

as Gladys

Dave Courtney

as Baxter

Gary Tiplady

as Burke

Callum Dixon

as Hare

Hugh Fraser

as Arthur Burnett CBE

Paterson Joseph

as Sean Boetang

Stephen Marcus

as Lenny Von Something

Ray Parlour

as Vince

Cleo Rocos

as Sharon

Steve Speirs

as Mystery Man

David Seaman

as Huge Gangster

Terry Stone

as Repro Man

Badi Uzzaman

as Singh