Lighthouse Bill (voice)
Patrick Steptoe
Longneck (voice)
Conrad (voice)
Professor Craven (voice)
Cardinal Lawrence
Danzi (voice)
Bob
Williams
Self - Narrator
Spencer
Robert "Bob" Hayes
Mr. Woodhouse
Timofey
Sinclair (voice)
Edward
Howard Clifford
Mr. Brundish
Billy Mack
Ambrose Hilliard / Uncle Frank
John Kildare
Sergeant Wilson
Socrates (voice)
Self - 'Flushed Away' and 'Arthur Christmas'
Douglas Ainslie
Cliff
Tom Sergeant
Johnny Worricker
Johnny Worricker
Naberius
The Network (voice)
The Hungry Corpse
Self - Narrator (voice)
General Fallon
Graham Greene (voice)
Spoken Quotations (voice)
Matthias
Hephaestus
Douglas Ainslie
Grandsanta (voice)
Johnny Worricker
The Professor
Rattlesnake Jake (voice)
Richard Madsen
Rufus Scrimgeour
Victor Maynard
Alexander Keyes
Dr. Elefun (voice)
Leonard Saber
Quentin
Friedrich Olbricht
Arnold Percy
Ringmaster (voice)
The Preacher
Met Chief Inspector
Richard Hart
Whitey (voice)
Alan Blunt
Captain Davy Jones
Narrator
Viktor
Gideon Warner
Sir Bernard Pellegrin
Lawrence
Slartibartfast
Dylan (voice)
Robin
Stamfordham
Phillip
Earl of Clincham
Viktor
Billy Mack
James Mortmain
Uncle Louis Gryffoyn
Roger
Ray Robertson
Lord Sandwich
Mr. Johnson
Ray Simms
Edward Gardner
Jeremy Saville
Tristan
Julian
Roger Maitland
John Tracey
Oliver Latham
John Tracey
Hugh Marriner
Howard Nash
Martin Barton
Tiger Brown
Ronald Marsh
Helmut Hoffmann
ENT Doctor
Connor Mullan
Squadron Leader Blenkinsop
Officer
Colin Street
Katherine's Co-worker (uncredited)
Player in Everyman Theatre Company, Liverpool